Don't Let Fear Limit You

It was always interesting to be sitting in a small office with someone who had obviously spent most of his adult life attempting to create an image of intimidation and fear in others, but who was so afraid of even trying to start on something new and unknown. I would hear the excuses, the reasons why they couldn’t do this or couldn’t do that. No one would hire them because of how they look. School was just not for them. Drug treatment was a waste of time. They didn’t see a point to finding different people besides the homies.

In the end all of these excuses came from one place - Fear. They were afraid of the unknown, judgement, rejection, difficulties, failure. Every fear preventing them from moving forward in life. Each fear keeping them in a place most did not want to be in any longer. The challenge for me was getting them to recognize and accept their fears and then find ways to work past them.

Fear will hold you back more than you realize.

If you find yourself never starting, or quitting right after you start, it’s possible that fear is the main reason for this happening. This fear can take many shapes: fear of failure, fear of looking stupid, fear of what others think, fear of not knowing, fear of success and so on. Everywhere you look you can find a reason to stop doing something. If you’re ever not sure why you aren’t following through, it’s most likely linked to fear.

How do you get past fear?

Unfortunately, doing so is not always easy. One of the first things is to recognize what and why you have your fear. If you don’t know what you’re afraid of, there is no way to understand that fear, face it, control it or free yourself from it. This step requires you focusing on yourself and the blocks around your doing something. You can utilize a journal, meditation, exercise (preferably something that lets you think while you are doing it), walking, etc. whatever actions that will let your mind stare at itself and see what is keeping you back.

Once you have an idea of what your fear may be, examine it.

Look at the fear from a distance. Does the fear make sense? Is the fear real? What’s the likelihood the fear will come true? If the fear came true, how would it really affect you? Could you deal with that outcome? If the fear never happened, what would that mean for you and your goal? How far could you go if you never experienced the fear?

By examining your fear, you can now plan and process how you can deal with your fear. This is when you will be able to make steps forward and away from the thing that had been holding you back and preventing you from starting or doing what you had been wanting to do.

Let the fear go and push forward.

You will be surprised at how inane and unrealistic your fears are and have been. How much of your life have you given up due to this fear? What haven’t you done? Who haven’t you become because of fear? Where could you be right now if you hadn’t been stopped by the fear? Use these questions to remind and motivate yourself to not allow the fear to stop you from achieving.

Often you will find that the fear is not as scary or terrible as you had made it out to be. When things are ill-defined, or unknown they can seem so real. But once defined and seen for what they really are, those fears that were so awful can now no longer interfere and shape your progress.

When you see that your fear has been limiting your growth, you can easily move past it. This fear will no longer be a reason for not doing. You can actually start and see how you will keep the process moving forward without stopping.

Continue to reassess and refine as you move forward.

Even though you recognize and work on your fears, they will continue to dog your progress. You can never really become completely free of fear. Some fear will always try to get in the way of your accomplishing your goals. So it is important to continue to question what may be hindering your progress. You will need to ask those same questions throughout the process in an attempt to keep yourself on track and on task.

When you recognize and examine the fears that are stopping or slowing your ability to complete your goals, you will often find that they were baseless and nothing more than anxieties created in your mind. All you needed to do to be free of them is to see them for what they are and then work your way past them. By managing this process you allow yourself to start and finish those things that are the most important to you and your future self.